On Things Consentual, Contextual

But again, it comes back to what happens in the bedroom and what happens in real life. I can enjoy things in the context of sex or flirting that I don’t want to happen in my day-to-day life.

From Stop Telling Me What I’m Supposed to Like (warning, somewhat graphic, you’ve been warned)

An older post, but this really makes sense to me. Just because you enjoy certain things doesn’t make you a misogynist, or invalidate your feminism.

Engineered Isolation

…we have created an environment and a culture that cut us off from connection, or offer only the parody of it offered by the Internet. The rise of addiction is a symptom of a deeper sickness in the way we live — constantly directing our gaze towards the next shiny object we should buy, rather than the human beings all around us.

The writer George Monbiot has called this “the age of loneliness.” We have created human societies where it is easier for people to become cut off from all human connections than ever before. Bruce Alexander — the creator of Rat Park — told me that for too long, we have talked exclusively about individual recovery from addiction. We need now to talk about social recovery — how we all recover, together, from the sickness of isolation that is sinking on us like a thick fog.

From The Likely Cause of Addiction

This seems to explain the emotional eating I’ve been doing when working at home by myself.  All the more reason to get out and connect with people each day.

Photo

Risk

Those who are hungry, angry, talented and have something to say are too often sidelined by record companies, magazines, publishers….In our current risk-averse culture, convention-breaking or non-conformism is thin on the ground….
And so now: there has never been a better time to fight for what you believe in and produce art, express yourself and believe in your own relevance and credibility –as opposed to simply being an obedient and passive consumer. Look back at the independent heroes of the past, and be inspired.

From http://www.qthemusic.com/9247/guest-column-diy-graham-bendel/

Props Lois

On Gender

So an article on CNN says that part of the problem in Baltimore is a lack of older men – a lack of male role models for young black men.

At first I thought that that seemed sensible, but then I thought “wait… I thought gender wasn’t important” and then I thought, “that’s sexist and invalidates the efforts of single moms or other non-traditional families.”

And I thought about gender exclusive vocations and activities, clubs and colleges, and whether the benefits were hopelessly entangled with the costs. 

And then I just felt really frustrated because it seems the only safe thing to do about gender discussions is to just avoid them.

And then I felt frustrated because I was looking for the safe thing to do.